Heroes (Ed: by The Georgie Spice, Tom's youngest sister)

My brother Tom has the best morals of anyone I know. He knows right from wrong alright. He is also innately tidy and organised and makes it very clear how unimpressed he is by my general messiness. Tom jolly well likes a good cleaning session and, well, it’s not that he enjoys it particularly but that he has such a deep sense of morality, respect and self motivation. Mess is unacceptable to Tom. When he comes to stay at Dad’s his packing and unpacking of his suitcase is military. It’s always been that way. I remember my first visit to Tom’s home Bystock and being blown away by what a decadent building he lived in – with all its giant antlers on the walls and the grand sweeping wooden staircase. Tom I’d love to meet your friends I said “don’t like ‘em – Nutters” he says. That’s not to say Tom is unpopular himself, quite the opposite. I remember how Tom confidently showed me around the grounds of Bystock farm and he regaled me with a story about a Christmas time where there was some “wringing of turkey’s necks” on the farm; with which he would make the wringing gesture with his hands and the cracking sound with his vocal chords in ever such a perfunctory way. Another memory I have is of attending a Bystock Christmas party - I couldn’t believe my eyes as I saw my brother rocking out to Metallica on the disco floor and having an air guitar showdown/dance-off with a buddy.
It was clear to see how music released him, as it does all of us, and it was brilliant to see him so free. Tom’s wing of Bystock was always immaculate and he would proudly show off his prized collection of Heavy Metal and Rock music; Metallica and Lars being at the forefront of his passion. Also held in high regard was Tom’s Blade DVD’s. Wesley Snipes was a bit of a hero to him - A tough, stand alone vigilante. Tom has always had a rapport with strong male role models – from our uncle Pete with his band in Devizes ‘Rough Justice’, to my ex-boyfriend of 6 years, Antony, a security guard. The excitement in Tom’s eyes as Antony would tell him about catching “bad boys”. He would get Antony to tell him stories over and over again! Antony was very respectful of Tom and was never patronising towards him. They would spend hours ‘touching fists’ and sharing stories over a beer. Tom just wants to be treated as an equal and have a laugh with his family and friends. The night he DJ’d at a family Christmas a few years ago was genius. His eyes shone, he danced and engaged and we were one.

I attended Alex Proud’s Rock the Boat at Proud Camden this summer. It was a night for those with learning disability to get their “rock on”. I was down right impressed by DJ Tim Westwood’s punctilios attention to the crowd. The night was awesome, the energy in the room was vibrant – a meeting of minds all there for one purpose – to let go, have fun, dance their hearts out.

Tom doesn’t enjoy crowds very much and at our sister Kate’s surprise birthday party in July we were surrounded by close friends and family at our brother in-laws restaurant in east London. Tom was the perfect host, mingling and generally enjoying the evening, as is often the case when Tom is around those he knows. After pudding and speeches Tom and I looked at each other and agreed we were going to call it a night. The 15 minute walk from the restaurant to home was an eye opening one for me. I avoid Old Street on a weekend night, as like Tom I’m not keen on crowds and feel uncomfortable around swarms of people. To my quiet surprise, Tom’s demeanour and body language was resolute – confidence radiated from him.

He was being my older protective brother.

I was stressing out trying to get a cab and Tom, head high, walking purposefully, by my side – seemingly forgoing his idiosyncratic tendency to stride ahead or lag behind.

Everyone needs a hero. Tom’s going to meet his and no one deserves it more than my brother.