Oh man, more issues. And a link to something funny about Lars Ulrich

I rang the woman from Sibs today, the Sibling charity. I have to say I wasn't feeling it a great deal, I've just got on with things really and she talked for England and the rest of Europe, but their were key things that I picked up in her conversation that rang very true for me when I was a kid:
Not getting any information from parents; only being told off for not treating your brother with extra special tolerance.
Not knowing it, but knowing it deep down, that your parents were quite stressed by everything
Feeling freaked out because you are teased at school, stared at in the street or worried about what people might do to your sibling
So that reduces it down to a few short lines
Personally, I'd forgotten about this, what I have never forgotten about is quite how absolutely vile and horrid I was to my brother, including, once, threatening him with a knife because I could not make him behave. Even writing this shit is giving me some really bad feelings. There is no way that a kid can cope with a kid that's fairly out of control and whose behaviour is not really understandable. If we'd known more about Tom's condition when he was young then we could have been careful around him and made sure not to do things that he seriously never would be able to cope with.

So, there's a big heap of shit here, I could write for hours but I won't because it's beginning to feel like group fuckin therapy here, and actually I am just trying to arrive at a good place to move on to the next stage of our road trip, which is essentially about doing something special for Tom.

It's good I've got this blog here to mull this shit over in my head, because without it I'd just rush in like i always did as a kid, pushing Tom into a behaving like me, the so-called 'normal' sibling

if i do that then I am just a ginormous and useless fucker.

sorry i haven't put any Tom pictures up, my scanner is anathema to my tech skills, as is getting a movie up on this blog, and making the comments boxes active. there's a gremlin in my machines.

on a lighter note, i listened to some comedian doing a whole thing on a radio station about his night out with Lars Ulrich. Listen here:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=59xskijoM-g. Now I have partied with some mental assholes, and they've turned out to be fucking diamonds; I have partied with some other mental assholes, who turn out to be, well, just assholes. I really hope he is the former. Am sure he is...